Passin'

So, okay. I wrote summat ("Happy Fun Bags"), and I put it up, and then I took it down. Now, I'll put it back up again.

Moving on.

So, I wrote a story, I write stories, and I sometimes show up in them, or I write blog entries, and I show up in those.

So, but really! A 24 yr-old girl who doesn't even look 14? C'mon, really, `phfina!

No, really.

You know how I know.

I mean 'older' people telling me this is no biggie: they' re old! What do they know of this generation? Nothing! 'cause their old!

Not that I don't love me some old people ... they are SO CUTE! and I'll stop now before I get into MORE steaming hot water from all you old people who read me.

(You old people are SO CUTE! teehehe!)

(okay, I'll stop now) (even though I never do, eh, `phfina?)

But how about from ... young people?

So, okay, I was at my brother's house last night, ... no, not bb's, but Mike's.

You know with my niece who has infantile spasms?

Well, anyway, he's, like, OLD! (there I go again), but he surrounds himself with kids ... he's like a father and an older brother to them. He doesn't take any shit and he lays down the law.

He also doesn't give a fuck. He'll LET you be you.

Find another adult who'll do that for you as a teen.

And he won't let your shit slide, either, he'll call you on it and hold you to task.

Find another adult who'll do that for you as a teen.

So there' re always lots of kids around his XBoxes (XBoxen) at his place, and his cousin, my cousin, Kyle is in on my little secret, but newcomers ...

So last night I was there and Kyle is home from school and he brings a new friend, and Kyle is like really protective of me, too? and that's sweet, especially with other boys who think they can push a girl, and Kyle gets all 'Kuya' on them ('older brother').

So, there was this new kid, 'Mac' and he's ... well, Kyle's in the wrestling team, and this kid could go that way or be in the basketball team, and maybe he's in both, idk.

Anyway, he's like, 'c'mon, li'l girl, 1v1 in teh Haloz, I'll kick your ass!' ('cause girls can't play video games?)

So I was like to Kyle, 'New guy wants to play me on Halo!'

And Kyle gives it right back, "Don't mind me laughing when you lose!"

Grrrrr! I'll show them!

So we get it on. We load up the map, and I take the lead with Rockets.

Yeah, girl power. I'm thinking of changing my name from `phfina to 'Rocket Red' or sommat.

Then it goes back and forth, and, okay, Mac is the better shot, and so at the end, two kills with his sniper and he wins the game.

'I'm good with the sniper,' he says, and I can hear pride in his voice.

"Yes, you are," I answer truthfully.

I can feeling him checking me out.

"You wanna get a burger at 5 guys?" he says.

I'm like, "Nah."

And he's like, "Why? You don't go out with black guys?"

I smile, "That's not it."

"What, you a salad girl?"

I smile, and take a swig from my beer.

His face registers shock: "Mike will kill you if he sees you drinking that."

He's not joking. My big brother Mike is a hard ass, or 'iron fist,' as he says, and everybody who comes to his house knows that, or finds out the hard way.

I think about singing some lyrics I've heard recently that go: "Do what the fuck you want to do."

But I see Kyle grinning, in on the joke, so I ask Mac, "Why?"

He rolls his eyes. "Just put that away before Mike catches you, okay, little girl?"

I laugh, and he's like, "Whatever." So I'm like, "Really, why? How old do you think I am?"

And he's like, "Oh, come on! You're my age!"

"Which is ..."

"I'm fifteen." he actually almost sticks out his chest.

I would have guessed older, but Mike is the kind of person how attracts people around him who are ... well, mature: well-behaved, polite, all that, and still 15 or whatever, asking out girls, sticking out their chests, thinking about and worrying about college, and all that.

But Mac thought I was his age.

I mean: really.

In fact, after we cleared up that I wasn't the kind of girl who liked to go out with older boys (and I didn't go any further than that ... I'm not out to all my family) (and I don't need to defend why to you) (I have uncles that are ... well, anyway), that I was, in fact, almost ten years his senior.

At first he didn't believe it.

At second, he didn't believe it.

I think he still doesn't believe it, even after I showed him my 'ghetto' iPod (version 2, that can just (barely) play video) and told him about graduating college (he almost vomited) and ...

And he still doesn't believe it.

"You're making this up!"

"I don't believe you."

"There's no way you are ... nah, that's bullshi-..."

(he stopped himself. Fear the Mike.)

And I was like, "Okay, that's fine."

And I was really fine with that. I mean, I could show him my driver's license, but fakes out there are good, aren't they? He's going to believe me or not, and either way, I was fine.

In fact, I felt ... complimented. He sees me as someone relatable (datable, even), one of his peers, his buds, his gfs, ... and he's fifteen.

Same way I saw him. I saw this tall guy who was cool with me, laughing with me, treating me as one of his own, and that was cool, to belong, to be in, to be friendly and treated friendly.

So, what am I saying? Besides nothing, as usual. I guess, what does it matter how old I am or how young I am, or how young you are, or how old you are? It doesn't, really, if we can relate, regardless of age.

And it is funny. `phfina, hangin' with the 15-year-olds, because they think she's one of them.

Yup, I'm passin'