Me

Hi. I'm 'phfina. I do a bit of writing. My blog color is Rose. I "like" Rose (understatement alert). I like roses, too. From what I write, you may or may not believe it, but I'm rather shy.

And thinking about it, I have a friend named 'shysky' and I thought, what does the sky have to be shy of? Nothing, right? It's there, looking down on people, and people are there, looking up at it. Do people care that it may or may not be shy?

Did I ever care? No. I just looked up at it, and the clouds, and the stars, and the rain, and the sun and the moon, and looked up in wonder or in annoyance or in disinterest, not a care in my head as to whether it was shy or not.

So what should I be shy of? Nothing, right? That should be my answer. But what, really, is my answer?

I'm shy of nearly everything. Should I be? No. Do I know it's selfish of me? Yes. Does that help? Not much. Some, maybe. A lot when I'm talking with you and you're asking me something or I'm asking you something and we're answering each other and just talking, you know?

But getting to 'just talking'? So, so hard for me. Looking at my alerts and seeing you there, knowing I must respond, if I have any integrity at all?

But what's worse is when I look and there's nothing there. And I feel so alone, so desolate.

Go ahead, say it. Call me a typical girl. Wanting it, but not wanting it.

And what's my solution?

I don't know.

Hi. I'm 'phfina. I'm a little bit shy, but I'm here, writing, writing to you and for you. I hope you like what I write.

kisses, 'phfina